Zombie Pigeon wasn’t quite sure how he became a zombie (or why he was a pigeon) but he knew it was something to do with next door’s black and white cat and mouldy old banana bread. He loved banana bread so much so that his fixation for it made him a tiny bit reckless, well as reckless as a senseless, fat pigeon could be. While all the other suckers fought over the crumbs on the bird table he would pick over those slabs that had been left to dampen on the lawn and while he ate he would sing a little banana bread ditty to himself to block out all the squabbling above him on the bird table.
Nope, as much as he wracked his little feathered brain, he could not recall the moment of his demise (although he often woke in the middle of the night on the tail end of claws and sharp teeth).
As for being dead, well he guessed he didn’t mind that at all. If he was an intelligent bird he would probably have answered that the fear of death is worse than death itself and for a pigeon, who are very fearful birds, this is quite true but ZP was not an intelligent bird on the scale of owls to road kill.
The only downside to death, that he could see, was a loss of luminescence in the feather department and the dead eye thing that still freaked him out when he looked in puddles. Okay, so he staggered more when walking, drooled and his wing was a bedraggled mess but he had a cool new call sign. While all the other pigeons had boring calls like, ‘oh, this is my tree,’ and ‘what can you see,’ his was a raspy and slightly creepy, ‘zombie pigeon, pigeon.’
Yep, being dead definitely had its advantages although he hadn’t quite worked out what they were yet.
Copyright ©RMC April 2018 Picture Copyright ©REC April 2018
5 thoughts on “Zombie Pigeon Tales”
This was wonderfully amusing to read, my favorite bit was ‘on the scale of owl to road kill’.
Brilliant… chuckled throughout
Thank you, hoping to post more
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